Content Warning: Sexual play relating to someone identifying as a little.
I was inspired to write this after a twitter exchange from the delightful littleswitchbitch. Wondering about her interest in DD/lg she was not sure however about using the term ‘daddy’. So this is how our dynamic works from a Male Dom perspective.
After I finish work, I walk home and unlock the door. The first sight as I walk in is usually my two children beaming at me. “Daddy!” they’ll say as they help me take my coat off and put my shoes away. I get a cuddle in before their enthusiasm is replaced by their next love, dinner. This is one of the best parts of my day and I wish to saver it until the day they don’t want to greet me with such joy. Next I walk into the kitchen, there will be littlegem. We will greet each other “Hello Daddy”, “Hello Mummy”. So far, so normal.
But after the children are tucked up in bed and it’s just us two it’s not unusual for littlegem, or should I say Ruby, to call me Daddy. This is where a difference is made, and it’s one that not everyone is comfortable with.
Occasionally littlegem likes to be a little, it could be because we are going to do something fun, or it could be spur of the moment. That’s why I wish to encourage Ruby in any way possible. She has little things, arts and crafts, cute clothes and she recently has purchased a mermaid backpack. But it’s the vocabulary that can be contentious, especially given that we are a family with young children.
So is it Weird?
The short answer for me is no. A longer answer would be that it is strange, but I’d probably be lying if this was the most unusual activity we do. It is taboo and from a kink perspective that is probably a good thing. It pushes boundaries in a safe way. That said it is understandable why it is not for everybody and can be a negative trigger. Not just the DD/lg dynamic but that word “daddy”. Of course there are others names, Sir, Master, but Daddy feels different, or at least it does to me.
The word may be the same between my own children and littlegem but the tone and the meaning are completely different. We could be in the supermarket as a family and littlegem will ask “Daddy, shall we get some oranges?”, I will answer accordingly. But then we will walk down the aisles and she’ll see something she likes, something for her. “Daaaddddy” she’ll say, and I know the tone already, “can we get this sparkly, rainbow coloured, glow in the dark, flashing thing with unicorns on?”
There is a bit of fun in the fact that this is done completely in public, nobody knows the back story, all they see is some parents having some fun. The only time it would get weird is the time when we don’t have the children with us. Ruby is even more likely to pop up then but it still doesn’t change things. She has only once gone out in public with her Ruby collar on, and that was when I took her to the local garden centre, because I clearly know how to show her a good time.
The truth is that there is rarely a time when she refers to my real name. I am Daddy, Daaaaddy or Master. If it wasn’t for having children I may have felt differently about it, I guess I was already accustomed to being referred to that way.
If you ignored the content warning before now is the time to heed.
The main purpose for encouraging littlegem to explore her little side is because she has always been this way, we just didn’t name it. It’s not a role play, is it just a part of littlegem’s personality. So for the most part what Ruby is about is exploring the fun stuff she likes to do. Littlegem is a fantastic artist but of recent she hadn’t done much with it. Being Ruby allows here to draw and colour and she is rewarded for being creative now.
Another purpose was to protect her. Whenever she feels vulnerable she needs someone to look after her. It’s not unusual for Ruby to want a cuddle and to know she is safe. When her tummy hurts daddy is there to give her Calpol or a ‘hot bear’ (microwavable cuddly toy). Being a ‘daddy’ is a responsibility and it feels better to have that responsibility rather than not knowing how to control and deal with a situation. I know if everything else fails a cuddle in bed with her favourite toy ‘sparkle floss’ will do wonders with maybe a bedtime story.
This dynamic changed when things became sexual. It was never a decided thing, it just evolved like most things kink related. I did worry before how I’d feel about having sex with someone identifying as a 7 year old girl. Being called daddy is one thing but this is quite another.
The taboo and the feeling that this was wrong probably led to the increased naughtiness. The heightened state of ‘Am I really comfortable with this?’. I know we’re both consenting adults but the state of mind is different to usual.
Ruby is an innocent girl, so knows nothing about having sex. This means I take the lead, not a problem usually. This time I am teaching her, what it feels like to be touched, how to give and receive pleasure. Then I got on top of her, she’s lying on her back, her legs apart. She asks ‘what are you going to do now daddy?’
Our hips press together and my cock slips inside. She is incredibly wet, as the taboo has turned her on too. It feels more sensitive than usual, she gasps from even the slightest movement and tells me to be gentle. It’s difficult to put into words but it is like having sex with another person and that can be a lot to process. But the fact of the matter is that the sex is extremely hot.
The Meaning of Words in the Moment
In an everyday situation there are some words that I am uncomfortable saying. For point of example I will use the word ‘slut’. Slut is not a word I typically use and I still have difficulty when it comes to understanding my own feelings about it. I understand its use for humiliation within consented agreement, but should I be saying it if I don’t feel completely comfortable.
But change the situation, one where I am in control and full of dominant feelings and all of sudden things change. I have the confidence now to use such language, if I feel it is appropriate. It is simply down to that particular moment. Littlegem is now a greedy anal slut, it’s more likely the confidence of the delivery rather than the words themselves that make the difference.
Putting that into context, for me the word ‘Daddy’ is more about responsibility, nurturing and creating a safe environment. It allows littlegem a place she can go to, to be silly and have fun away from responsibility. It’s good for her mental health to have an outlet for her feelings, for me it’s lovely to simply watch her play with her toys and draw.
But there is another side. When she’s playful and in the mood. During the heat of passion, those words are incredibly sexual and a massive turn. That’s why I love it when she uses the word Daddy during sex. It feeds my dominance, to take control in a completely different way. She tells me how tingly it makes her feel, how it makes her want to explode. I know what it means and while for littlegem I wouldn’t always let her orgasm, for Ruby I’m a little kinder. It’s those moments when she is screaming Daddy that make me happiest.
Whatever you want to call and however you want to play with it. Little play can be fun and rewarding, possibly a bit sexy too.