I once read that when you reach an age ending in 9 you do more daring activities. Marathons, jumping out of a plane, that sort of thing. Justifying your age by proving to yourself that you aren’t past it before the start of a new decade in your life. Littlegem and I are both of that age, so I don’t know whether that was a factor or not but we’ve had a crazy week, including our first ever munch.
Our First Munch
We don’t do social events. Eroticon this year was the only time we’d ever met people who knew about our kink side and could openly discuss with. Nobody in the real world knew, we’ve tried to open up to our friends but they don’t seem interested.
However littlegem happened to see an event on Fetlife. It was a local munch so close we could walk. I have the final decision on these matters and I know how much she wants to get more involved. We have the SafeworD/s Club online, but it’s something else to meet people. I said yes, let’s do it. I was nervous, littlegem was nervous. There were many questions we asked on the walk there, who do we call ourselves? How much do we reveal about ourselves?
Unsurprisingly everyone we spoke to was so lovely. We had a couple speak to us before we got in the door and it makes a massive difference to feel so welcomed. Even still I was disappointed that I couldn’t walk up to strangers and talk to them, luckily though there were plenty that came to us. ‘First time?’ they could see us from a mile off. It was a great experience and wasn’t long before we were looking up our next event.
I don’t think it helped that much was extra busy due to its ‘Birthday’ of being running so long. But we didn’t feel like we were in a corner talking to ourselves for too long. It was lovely to see so many different types of dynamics and personalities and how open everyone was when talking to us. A few people went out of their way to include us and make us feel at ease, something that we really appreciated. I am really glad that we pushed ourselves to go, something we should have done a while ago.
We regularly chat on the SafeworD/s Club. It’s our kind of munch, online so you can sit in your pyjamas and no one can tell you are a really awkward person. Missy and HL run an excellent topic every Tuesday and Sunday and were looking for ideas. I suggested a chat where one person is asked questions by the others. An in depth look into a dynamic, that was the idea. It was then we were asking if we would be the first ones to do it, eek. I said yes, not wanting to be a let down and feeling in a mood to push ourselves.
The questions were thick and fast for almost an hour. It was good that littlegem was next to me on her laptop as we sped through the questions people asked. Going through questions like how we met, what toys we liked and the strangest places we’ve had sex.
Afterwards we agreed that we enjoyed doing it. Although next I’d like to be the person asking the questions.
The Rope Bite
When littlegem was researching events after the munch she found one and informed me via message.
“I’ve found a rope event near us, can we go?”
“Yes, when is it?”
A friend was kind enough to step in for childcare. They came over the following night, asking if we were going anywhere nice. This is a friend that knows we’re into ‘stuff’ but doesn’t know the details. I feel she’d rather not know, so when we said where we were going there was only a hint of awkwardness from her…
What was nice about the rope bite was a lot of the people that we had met a few days earlier were there. This made it feel less daunting to start off with and we were immediately greeted with smiling faces. PurpleSole took with him the rope bag I had made and although we talked for most of the night, we did get it out near the end and got some use of it. PS has more knowledge than he thinks when it comes to rope so it was lovely when he received compliments for his work.
The highlight of the night for me was getting to watch a couple of people get suspended. I find it mesmerising the amount of intricate ties that are involved in rigging and suspending people. Also the connection between the rigger and bunny was lovely to watch.
Overall I think I am finding it easier to assimilate myself with the other humans. The biggest barrier is the unknown. What will the place look like, what sort of people will there be? By taking those first steps out into what is a new world for us, we have done the hardest part.