My day collar is very important to me, I have written before about how it symbolises the ownership of me by PurpleSole. How it means as much to me as my wedding ring. Recently in this heat after my rosacea and prickly heat took up battle on my neck and face I was compelled to take my collar off. It was just for a day, but it felt wrong. Like there was a part of me missing. I knew I wasn’t going out that day as I could not think about stepping out of the house without it on. Even though no one has really noticed or said anything about my collar, it just didn’t feel right not having it there.
The only reason I would usually take my collar off is to bath (I wouldn’t want the leather to get wet) or when It is replaced with a different collar.
Collars for Persona’s
Part of our dynamic and what makes up me as a person and submissive is my different personas, puppy and ruby. You can click the links to find out more about them if you wish. They both have their own collars, which although aren’t integral to me being in their head-spaces the collars for them still mean a lot to me.
Puppy’s collar symbolises the start of the play for me, I have written before about how I can be puppy without the collar but I prefer not to. In this post that PS and I wrote for The SafeWorD/s club about puppy, I think it has the best photo of her collar. Her collar makes puppy feel beautiful and loved. Unlike most of my collars, it is also functional. Master will attach her matching leash to the ring to take some extra control of puppy.
With ruby things are a little bit different. I flit in and out of being ruby with ease so her collar plays much less of a part. Although it still holds significance for me. This post about ruby’s birthday party has a nice picture of her wearing her collar. But I don’t think you can see the details inside the glass locket very well. There is little ruby gems and one purple gemstone, a letter ‘R’ and a key inside the rose gold floating charm locket. All things that I picked to signify ruby and being owned by Daddy. I cut and have sown the red leather for the collar myself with a little glittery rose gold fabric detailing.
All my collars have rose gold featuring in them. I am really a freak for having things matching. I guess I have to impart my control somewhere. The reason I went for rose gold initially is because my wedding and engagement rings combined feature both yellow and white gold, and platinum. So rose gold for me was a different but still precious metal. In my mind having different metals is still matching, they are just eclectic.
Cuffs in Rituals
The main use we have for cuffs is for my ritual of being chained into PS’s bed. A cuff is attached to the bedpost with a chain linking to the cuff on my ankle. I am only allowed to leave with PS’s permission. This ritual works really well for us, it is the last thing we do before the day ends so it’s nice to have that reminder of our power exchange. It is also comforting, having the leather snug but not tight around my ankle all night. It’s as if PS himself has his loving grasp over me, securing me. I always find it funny that the most free and submissive I feel is whilst I am not free at all, but cuffed and held in place.
Collar and Cuffs in Play
At the beginning of some play PS will swap my day collar for my play collar. I originally made it to wear so certain fluids wouldn’t damage my day collar. Although it features an O ring, again it’s not really functional. I guess a thin chain might be able to attach to it to some nipple clamps, but the ring isn’t thick or sturdy. It did form part of a ritual where I would kneel before play for PS to exchange them. This helped me switch mindsets a bit in the beginning, but over time the potency of this has faded slightly for me. We also do a lot of play that isn’t planned so will not have changed the collars over. I think I would quite like a collar that is more functional, more weighty so things can be attached, but we will see.
At the moment if PS requires a thicker collar he will borrow puppy’s. We have cuffs that match it so it can be used with them for a scene. The sturdy D rings on the collar and cuffs can have chains attached, in this post we recently write you can see how that might work.
We do use and borrow our cuffs from other purposes in our dynamic. With our sex bench especially. If PS has decided he doesn’t want to use rope to secure me to the bench, he has to gather all the cuffs from around the house. Ankle cuffs from our bedroom and cuffs off the spreader bars etc. One day we will get round to buying a set purposefully for the bench. But of course the ones I would like, including thigh cuffs and all matching would cost a pretty penny. I have just realised that we have never written a post about how we made our sex bench, there are some photos with it featuring in Climax and Full Metal Racket. Maybe a post for another time.
Not just functional, our cuffs have been used for more decorative purposes as well. When I played the role of PS’s birthday genie I think the cuffs really made the part. I would quite like a pretty collar and cuffs set to be used when out for more dressed up occasions as well. Something that is subtle but still hinting at the D/s which is laced through our lives.