When PurpleSole and I first delved into pet play and specifically puppy play we were fairly new to D/s and still figuring out our dynamic. After a couple of play scenes, that although had positive results, I still felt very conflicted about my feelings towards the play. I have written before on The SafeworD/s club about these first few experiences of puppy play and finding an alternative head space.
I then sought to find more information online about the subject and more specifically people who used it as play in their already established D/s relationship. I guess I wanted to have my feelings validated, that it wasn’t just me that enjoyed this. I found little to nothing on the subject and puppy play with women as opposed to men being the pet, I found even less. I drew a conclusion that this meant it’s something people or women wouldn’t be interested in or do, but I think that is incorrect. The subject does hold a bit of stigma and taboo with it, so I think it’s more a fact that people haven’t written so much about it.
We did find some information on pet play, more specifically puppy play that involved females on one of our favourite video based information site, eXtreme Restraints University, some time after. So whether or not people do want to have some information, I have decided to supply some. This is how we do puppy play and how it works for us.
How pet play fits into our dynamic
Note to reader: I refer to puppy in third person, even though it is me I am talking about. Sorry for any confusion this may lead to.
I don’t like the term but I guess for ease to describe PS and I would be a 24/7 D/s lifestyle. He is my Dominant all day everyday, I follow certain rules and rituals to keep our mindsets in place as much as possible. I am not puppy all the time, or referred to as puppy. The same as I am not ruby all the time either. Although sometimes these personas do come out in certain situations, mostly we will indulge in puppy play of an evening. Usually on Wednesday evening either puppy or ruby will come out to play, but either PS or I have suggested it on other nights if we are feeling in the mood. This just works well for us.
Keeping my personas on a sort of second level to my submissive self makes it easier for me. Although puppy and ruby are submissive to PS, he is their carer, they take no real responsibility for themselves. This is very freeing and something I find very enjoyable, but would not work in my day to day life. I have two young children to care for and responsibilities to manage. Also, puppy has a more playful side to her, she’s mischievous. She can get away with things that I and PS would deem inappropriate and possibly disrespectful for my sub self to do. Puppy can do these things as it’s part of her personality.
Before we start play, I have a few items that I put on that help me get into the right head space. I don’t think they are necessary but they are fun for us and I think they make puppy feel pretty.
Puppy has a tail, this is actually the second tail. The first one had a mishap with puppy kneeling on it whilst jumping on the sofa.
PS let’s me pick out puppy’s accessories, he wants to make sure I am comfortable with them and sees it as me building puppy’s character. It took me a while to find what I wanted, if you search for ‘puppy butt plug tail’ most of what comes up are solid silicone. Not the pretty swishy soft tails that I had in mind. My searches eventually took me to Etsy where they had a vast range of different colours and styles. The tail puppy has now I particularly love as the plug can unscrew and they sell a vast amount of different sizes and shape plugs to screw in. They can be sold with a ribbon to attach instead but I really enjoy things in my butt so knew that was the direction for me. I like the medium size plug and the longer shape as it carries more weight with it, I like to feel that it’s their, a constant reminder. The longer shape is just for fun, it feels great to insert.
The first accessory we got was a tail and it didn’t take me long to feel comfortable enough to want further accessories. After a long search on the Internet we found a beautiful rose gold and leather collar with matching leash. For me this helps to make the transition to puppy, the other accessories I put on separate and usually on my own. I will then kneel for PS to swap my collar and this starts the play. A bit later on we did get a name tag made as well, PS liked to remind me of what the people making it must have thought of me, makes me blush every time.
I wanted something on my hands and feet to act a bit like paws but couldn’t find anything that wasn’t heavy looking black PVC (not really my style). So I purchased some soft white leather ballet pumps, I wanted them flexible but durable. I made dog paw pads out of brown leather and attached them to the soles of the pumps. Although puppy doesn’t actually use her feet, as she walks and hands and knees on all fours, I liked the effect they created. Next for my hands, I purchased some rather nice tight white leather driving/bike gloves. The knuckles are exposed as I liked the effect and the leather again is nice and soft. The look I wanted was really for myself, if I feel attractive then I feel more comfortable with everything else I am doing. I know puppy’s accessories are not realistic, you can buy face masks, movement restricting dog paw gloves etc, but they are just not me. I know straight away I would not feel comfortable looking that way, I guess I feel a need for my femininity to shine through and the items you can buy just don’t do that for me. Everyone is different!
Another thing I will do to prepare is put on makeup, in my day to day life I don’t tend to bother with makeup unless I am going out for a special occasion. With play it is different, I think it helps my mindset as I am making myself nice for PS. This is also helpful if PS decides to take photos, although ones of my face don’t appear on the blog, I find it helps the experience all round. Wearing makeup and how I feel about myself directly affects my aptitude behind the camera. Puppy also has ‘ears’ this is my hair put up in high bunches, perhaps in the future I will look at getting clip on ears but for now I am happy with how my long hair flows down the sides of my head.
Play always starts in the same way. I kneel in front of PS and he exchanges my collar to puppy’s. Then really it’s free play, sometimes PS will have something in mind that he wants to do. For example walk puppy around on her leash, practice some obedience skills. Other times he will leave it more up to puppy. He always lays out all of puppy’s items; her water bowl, brush and toys on the floor and puppy can go and grab anything that she wants to do. Usually she likes to have a nice relaxing groom, so will grab the brush in her mouth and carry it over to PS. He will proceed to direct her to sit or roll over etc in positions he wants to brush her in. The feeling of the brush bristles against puppy’s skin is lovely and very relaxing. Sometimes PS will be occupied on the sofa and puppy will simply relax in his lap. It really varies greatly and is just what we feel like doing at that point in time.
Our puppy play does tend to get sexual, I think this is just who we are. It was this area of play I found most difficult to get my head around when we first started, the want and need was there and it couldn’t help but be satisfied. But my mind didn’t want it to be and fought it, I made myself feel bad for wanting it and was ready to give up the play we enjoyed. Time and openly talking about it has made me come to terms with my desires a bit more. I do think a part of me will always squirm retrospectively though.
To end the play (and PS always reminds me before we start) puppy will kneel in front of PS in my ‘waiting’ position. This is something that we have always used as an end to puppy play as it’s very distinct and a familiar position for me, we use kneeling as a daily ritual. Of course I can always use my safe word, but I tend to reserve this for a more immediate end to a situation. I personally feel safe words should always be an option and never ignored.
When trying to research pet/puppy play in the beginning it was the actual ‘what people did’ part that I couldn’t find much information on. I guess I wanted to compare myself and see if I was doing it right. Time and experience has taught me that there isn’t a ‘right way’, play should be what you want it to be, what you enjoy. Everybody is different and enjoys different things. That doesn’t mean there isn’t a wrong way though, any play should be consensual and safe (you know, within the perimeters).
Future of our pet play
For me the most important factor is that we enjoy it and it provides me with a freeing feeling. Maybe part of me will always feel slightly conflicted with my feelings about puppy play. I have said before that if I think too much about it, it just seems weird. Perhaps part of the enjoyment is derived from these feelings. At the end of the day does it really matter?
It’s a type of play that we both enjoy immensely and one that PS enjoys pushing me further with. There have been talks of puppy having a dog bed to relax and sleep on, I will have to wait and see.
I would also like to try other areas of pet play, as we haven’t really done that yet. Apart from PS Christmas surprise, Vixen, but that wasn’t quite the same. I like the look of the bunny tails and also the idea of a dressage horse intrigues me. Maybe in the future, but for now I will stick to puppy with our pet play.
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