Suck, Bang, Blow – Erotica “for men”

DSC_0316.jpgSuck, Bang, Blow

The metal fastenings of her corset slotted together with the precision of a Thompson Rifle. Her breasts, like FIFA regulation size footballs pressed together. The holes in her fishnets could trap a bream but not a perch. She was as beautiful as an E type, with curves to match.

She walked over to him, kneeling before him. He unzipped his blue jeans, pulled down his underwear, revealing his cock as hard as tungsten. Her skin was glowing like ceramic disc brakes as her lips wrapped around the tip. The sensation consuming him like the first sip of a refreshing pint. She continued, taking her time like an 70’s prog rock classic. Soon she was taking him deep, going down like a Vanguard-class submarine. He could feel the sensations come over him, much like the strong feelings he had at the end of the Shawshank Redemption. He had to withdraw, as quickly as the March of the Ten Thousand.

He laid her on the bed, like the flat 6 engine of a Porsche. He took his hand and brushed it against her cheek, it was as smooth as a well aged single malt. He knew to take his time, knowing the difficulties of cold starting a 2 stroke. Feeling her bottom, it was as firm as the steak he’d had last night. Continuing to tease her body in the way he’d tease the lid off an old paint tin. The hair that flowed down her back was as soft as that of his English Sheepdog, Graham. He reached between her legs, she was as slick as WD40. He thought he might need to lay down the sawdust.

Straddling on top of her the same way he would his Honda VFR800F, she could see intentions. His proud erection felt as high as the Nakatomi Plaza. He moved into place, their male and female ports connecting. Thrusting in and out ryhmically like a piston. The V6-like purr had now become a roar of a Merlin.

He fucked her with the pump action of a Winchester Model 97. She screamed in pleasure, much like when Utd scored that last minute winner. Suddenly he pulled out, much akin to a van driver on the B1107.

“Whats the matter?” she asks

Hang on a minute, I’ve got a great idea” was his reply.


16 Replies to “Suck, Bang, Blow – Erotica “for men”

  1. interesting and suddenly I don’t feel like a typical guy. I kind of had to think about how some of that blended. I know, don’t get caught up in the details, enjoy and have fun with it lol
    great piece.

    1. Thanks. I wanted to make a hyper-masculine piece. It’s tongue in cheek, using stereotypes so it’s a masculity that I wouldn’t fit either. I hope that came across.

  2. Bahahaha, this is ace! I had a proper giggle at:

    The hair that flowed down her back was as soft as that of his English Sheepdog, Graham.


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