The Dairy Dilemma


“I suppose we’re going to have you use a stock photo for this post”

“Nah, I’ll try and take a sexy photo of some milk”


Decisions, sometimes we just don’t want to make them. I know Littlegem doesn’t. So when I read about dom’s choosing food for their subs and told her she was excited. By this I mean when we’re out at a restaurant or having a takeaway. Littlegem is in charge of the everyday meals.

I tend to make decisions a bit quicker. In the past I’ve been guilty of getting frustrated by Gem’s dithering. So now she gets no say, I’m in control and will choose what she eats. This could be just us or with unknowing friends (although they have started asking questions). Its fun and has saved us a lot of time. It does have its downsides though.

There have been times I’ve made the wrong choice. I once picked a mango drink in a cafe for Gem. She smiled and thought I was joking. Turns out she doesn’t like mango. A different dom may say that it isn’t her choice, I have bought this for her and she should be grateful. But I didn’t.

I felt a failure, not as a dom, as a husband. Surely I’ve known my wife long enough to know what she does and doesn’t like? So instead I switch the drinks over, sliding my strawberry drink over to her.

Now I feel hesitation when choosing food or drink in a way I didn’t before. I also make sure I order two different things, hopefully I’ll get at least one right. This rule can be great for asserting control in an outside environment. I know Gem gets a lot out of it and generally speaking I enjoy it too.

However recently we found that our youngest child has a dairy allergy. Since she is breastfed Gem is also not to have dairy products. No chocolate, No cheese, No ice cream*.

Turns out there are many things that have milk that you wouldn’t expect. Now I have an additional consideration to make and it does bug me. It’s not just about personal taste anymore, it’s for our child’s welfare.

We went shopping and grabbed some lunch while we were out, just sandwiches and a drink, we had to be fairly quick. I look at the options and I just can’t find anything suitable. I therefore ask Gem to pick for herself, I’m not proud of myself.

I look down to see what she’s picked. Only an apple and mango drink. I love my wife but sometimes I just can’t work her out.

We may have to talk things through and maybe change the rules, after all children come before D/s.

*Gem has found substitutes for many dairy products and not all of them taste absolutely foul.

5 Replies to “The Dairy Dilemma

  1. I wonder if you could ask Gem to select from the options the ones she would be able to eat and then you could choose from there? For me that would work as it’s still an instruction to make the selection and ultimately the decision is yours. It might also mean that you could eat the same thing as each other (nice to do sometimes) and be safe in the knowledge that it’s not something she would dislike ?. To say please choose three or today I will choose for you means that there is also the spontaneity that she may enjoy as part of giving up control. missy x

    1. Thanks Missy. I showed Littlegem and we both think that’s a good idea. I’ll tell you how it goes next time we’re in that situation.

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