Ok, I’m just going to say it how it is.
I chain Littlegem into the bed every night, she needs permission to enter and permission to leave. I know what it looks like, but I can explain.
As part of our bedtime ritual Littlegem will kneel at the bottom of the bed and wait for me. She will hear me enter the room, allowing time for me to get ready. Only then will I grab the chain and instruct her to get on the bed. The cuff, which the chain is attached to, is put around her ankle and I tell her to get into bed.
The rule has made something of a rod for my own back. If Gem gets up and needs the toilet she needs to wake me up. I will then uncuff and recuff her when she comes back. I’m never going to say no when she asks for permission, I’m not that awful.
In the morning, we are typically awoken by the sounds of screaming children. Before I grab the child in need I will ask Gem “Who’s are you?”. This reaffirms our commitment to each other and is a nice way to start each day. “I am yours” she replies. The cuff is released and she is unchained.
I asked Gem what she likes about this ritual:
Kneeling at the foot of the bed makes me feel very submissive. We have hard floors in the bedroom so it isn’t comfortable, but to me that doesn’t matter. In the time waiting for PurpleSole to get himself ready for bed I like to let my mind empty itself of the stress of the day and just focus on waiting, this is very calming.
When PS puts the cuff around my ankle it just cements my feelings of being his to control. I like that very much, the feeling of being property almost, his property. The same with only being allowed to leave with his permission and only he is to take the cuff off.
The chain used to be a rope. It worked ok, but tying and untying knots can be a bind. Also I left it out one day only to be found by our 2 year old, eek. In comparison the velcro of the cuff can be released and put away in the cupboard, with the child’s mind suitably uncorrupted.
If you’re using rope make sure it’s a knot that doesn’t tighten when pulled at.